My weekend was a strange one.
I recently signed up on a free dating site. I created a lame profile and really didn't expect anyone to look or try to send me any messages.
I did have a few people contact me, and, I responded.
One person called me "cutie". I didn't know what that meant! The messages eventually have turned into text messages...and on a whim, as I was messing with my new phone, I took a picture of myself (yes, I am that egotistical) and thought it looked bad. I told the person texting me that I took a bad picture of myself and I looked like I was drunk. He asked me to send it...and after pausing for a long time...I sent it.
He said he liked it.
I am never one to stop, especially when there are compliments involved...so I took another one and sent it...
He liked that one too.
I didn't know what to think...but I realized it was a huge confidence booster. Just what I needed!
Another person I met there actually asked to meet in person. And, as anxious as I was, I agreed. He works on the same base I do...so I thought "what's the harm?".
He told me I was beautiful and he had never seen cammies look so good.
I almost passed out!
AND...last but not least...I was IM'ing last night with someone I met thru the same site...
Quite a cute guy.
He asked to see my webcam...so I did.
Mind you, Sunday afternoon, I dressed like a complete slob. Wife beater and cut off jeans. Hair undone, makeup all worn down from my day...
This man told me I had bedroom eyes...
I have Grave's Disease. Thyroid dysfunction that effects your eyes. Mine look buggy and popped out of my head.
But he liked them.
All of my life I have looked at myself as nothing special. I even had a period in my life where I was convinced I was not real and I didn't deserve to be seen.
Growing up I had a harsh opinion of my looks, and when I moved to California, it only got worse.
But, I have had other people notice me lately. Each complimenting me on how I look.
Maybe it's time for me to take a better look at myself and hopfully I can learn to see what they see!
After all, a very good friend told me this...
"You may not feel sexy and beautiful, but baby, you are..."