Well, today would have been 9 years married. January would have been 11 years as a couple.
He was everything to me. He was beautiful, strong, and everything I had dreamed of. He was my best friend, husband, lover, partner. Everything.
After 11 years...we have nothing to show for it. My children are the only thing that came out of that relationship that was good.
If you ever get a chance, listen to the song "Not My Slave" by Oingo Boingo. The words...after listening to them for years (by his request) NOW make sense.
He sent me a text today telling me that I am still his best friend and he will always think of me on this day and wonder how I am and hope that I am well.
I couldn't respond.
While I do appreciate the fact that he remembered and thought of me...I realized today, I truly haven't forgiven him.
So...happy anniversary to me...I think.
Thursday, November 20, 2008
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